No Limits Ladies.com

I got a good giggle over a renovating show I watched on the weekend. The couple bragged about their environmentally friendly house. Okay, some of the things they did were very kind to the environment, I'll happily agree (envying them their solar panels), but some… not so much.

For example: They talked about hardwood floors made from trees killed naturally by beetles. That would have been great except that to put these new gorgeous floors in, they tore out perfectly good existing floors. Wouldn't it have been more environmentally friendly to simply refinish the old floors?

The same thinking could apply to their walls and furniture. Yes, the kitchen table were designed by the Amish but what about the kitchen table they used to have? Where did that go? The landfill?

Then, there was the front yard. Yes, the green lawn they had took more water but instead of letting that die naturally and replacing it slowly with area friendly plants, they tore everything out. And they toppled a fir tree (that was the biggest shocker).

My first step along the road of being "green" is, when it doesn't mess with energy efficiency, I look long and hard at working with what I do have. Then if that doesn't work for me (for example: I want shutters in a bad, bad way), I look at reuse, used, and antique stores. No new trees killed and possibly things kept out of the landfill.

Oh, and it saves money too (especially, I'm finding on the shutters).

The hubby and I are going to two, count them two, housewarmings this weekend. The invite conversations were both the same. I get the call with the info. Can we come? Sure (answering for the hubby as I'm the entertainment director in the family). What do you want us to bring? Nothing, just yourself. (Great, I'm thinking, now I have to figure something out.). What do you need? Nothing, just happy guests.

I don't know about you but I'd be a much happier guest if I knew what the hostess wanted. For some reason, hostesses think that not stating a preference is "polite" and "nice."

It isn't. It is a pain in the butt for guests. We all know we have to bring something (in Chinese culture, it is easier, you simply bring cash or gift certificates). Now we have to guess, sight unseen (because that is the point behind a house warming, we haven't seen the house yet), what a couple, and in our case, an older, more established couple, want.

That's why as a frequent hostess, I always have a list of things I need and want for any get together. I leave gaps in my meal planning (usually dessert because then it doesn't matter when guests show up, beverages are tricky because it is needed right away). Friends have things like gardening parties where everyone brings a garden tool (watch out for the hoe jokes though) or pool parties where people bring pool stuff.

This serves as a good starter for conversations also, gets people talking.

I have a guest post over at Blunt Money today,
talking about some considerations when setting up house
for the first time.

Please pop by and say hi!

I often hear "It's not the destination, it's the journey." Sure, it is great to enjoy the ride once you're on it but for planning, concentrate on the destination. Anything else is too limiting.

For example:

The hubby and I are taking a cruise out of Barcelona. We want to see another country before Spain. We aren't too fussy about which country (we travel A LOT, we've seen most of Europe). The only limitation is that we have to be in Barcelona on a certain date.

Our first thought was to pop in to visit a dear honorary Uncle (an "Uncle" who is really a close friend of the family) in London. Our lodging would be free. Our food would be close to free (Uncle makes a won ton soup to die for). All we'd have to do is pay for transportation and incidentals.

The hubby kept our options open and continued looking. Turns out, a stay in Paris (LOVE Paris, being an art buff) even with the added cost of hotel and food would be less expensive (we're still seeing Uncle in London after the cruise).

We never would have seen that option if we hadn't continued looking.

That applies to wealth building too. The hubby and I have a combined target net worth we wish to reach. Our vehicle of choice thus far has been the bargain basement purchasing of beat up stocks. Does that mean we'll drive that beast forever? Nope. We continue to look for better and faster ways to get to our goals.

No, not THAT House Of Mouse. I'm not going to talk about Disney. Quite the opposite. If you don't like rodent talk, you might want to come back tomorrow.

Recently we found out we have mice or as the hubby sweetly thought A mouse (coming from the farm, I knew there's no such thing as A mouse, mice like hanging with their buddies).

At first, we were in denial. Our house is not dirty. Being quite empty and usually devoid of life, it is easy to keep clean. The hubby also wanted to know what the mice were eating 'cause he sure wasn't getting fed (I'm thinking they were ordering takeout).

But we weren't in denial for too long. One night, we left a bag of beef jerky open and out. The next morning, half the bag was done. We found it strewn underneath the stove (guess the mice didn't know there was no cooking necessary with beef jerky). Yep, we had ourselves mice and not the regular type either, snacking on breads and crackers. Nope, we have carnivore mice, the deadliest of all the rodents.

We went through the icky process of getting rid of them. We set up the live traps (with jerky 'cause our mice don't like the suggested peanut butter, I'm thinking they have allergies). We checked them every day. We then had to take long road trips out to the country (because they kept coming back, same mice).

The biggest lesson was one I seem destined to repeat over and over again. A dollar of prevention would have prevented a whole lot of grief. If we had spent a hundred dollars or so and covered the house with those sonic pest control devices, we likely wouldn't have had this problem in the first place.

For my last day at my contract gig, I brought in store bought (actually donut store bought) muffins for the team. Each muffin was baked in a paper muffin cup.

Every time I see those paper cups, I think of the Seinfeld muffin top episode ("Its not top of the muffin, to you!"). I suspect Elaine likes muffin tops because with those, she doesn't have to do that irritating and messy peeling off of the paper (I HATE that, if I wasn't so frugal, I'd also discard the bottom).

I know why stores use the paper muffin cups. They cook in mass quantities, don't use non-stick tins, and they make handling easier.

Do you know why YOU use paper muffin cups? I asked my own self that question years ago (I bought them because my Mom bought them). I DO have non-stick muffin tins. The muffins pop out perfectly after baking (easier if you let them cool until the tin is cool to the touch, not too long or the bottoms will be soggy). I'm also only baking a tin or two full so there's not a rush for clean up.

BTW… the trick to a perfect muffin is not to stir the batter too much (perfect for lazy me). It is supposed to be lumpy.

The Annual MasterCard Worldwide "Women In Small Business" survey shows that the number of women majority owned businesses grew at almost double the rate of all businesses (42% vs 23%).

That is great news! We are both starting businesses and retaining ownership.

All, but one, of the challenges to female led small businesses don't surprise me. They are the classics.

- Stretching ourselves across multiple roles and projects (21%),
(aka being an average woman)
- Healthcare costs (12%),
- Balancing family and work (11%),
and
- Lack of time to focus on generating new business (11%).

Which did I find surprising? The last one. Lack of time for sales and marketing.

Not that we have plenty of time for sales and marketing. Not by a long shot. I set aside a couple hours a day for my book promotions and I still don't think that is enough.

But what is surprising and healthy is that we recognize we don't have enough time. Usually, although it is business critical, sales and marketing is low down on an entrepreneur's busy to-do list.

Other interesting insights include that 41% of us use an accountant for financial management (29% use software) and that 18% of female led small businesses don't have a business credit or debit card. Yikes. I couldn't survive without mine.

There are unfortunately a lot of people out there talking a good game. They'll tell you they have your back (if they have to actually tell you that, odds are, they don't) but when change happens, good or bad, they're "unavailable."

When I was laid off, I was given two months notice to work at home (after that I'd be officially laid off and offered a severance). It looked to the world like the company cut me off immediately and I was hurting too much to explain the situation.

A funny thing happened. Some people started not returning phone calls or emails or would dodge lunches/dinners/family bbq's. I was surprised at who these people were (yep family and folks I thought were good friends).

I was also surprised at who the supporters were. The executive assistant I covered up a mistake for years before? She called a friend at another Fortune 500 company. They didn't have an opening… yet, but they expressed an interest in seeing me.

When I landed on my feet (At the end of the two months, another division of the company offered me a position. I turned that down, took the very generous severance, and went to a customer.), suddenly everyone was my friend again.

Now, I don't hold grudges but I DO remember whom I can count on. Those people I'd fly half way around the world to help out. And all it took was a returned email of support.

The interesting thing is that this happens with success also. This past week, when I was doing my shameless promoting, I heard "I'd book you on my blog but my female readers don't read romance" or "I'd buy your book IF I read romance" or "I don't read eBooks. Let me know when it is in print."

Then there is the opposite end of the spectrum. The brother who haunted the website because he wanted to be the very first buyer, the bloggers who offered up space as soon as they heard about the book launch, the friends, family, blog readers who bought the $6 book just to show their support. Heck, the people who emailed their congrats (I saved each one).

You think I'll remember these names? Yep. Until the day I die.

One of my best buddies got a Blackberry a couple weeks ago. She is already addicted. She checks it every five minute (yes, even during dinner out at restaurants). During my summers at home writing (on the computer), I have the same issue with email (sometimes I get lonely with only my imaginary characters for company). And we all know someone with a phone permanently attached to her ear.

Why is this a problem? Because it is a time suck. It eats up valuable minutes in an already time stressed day. It also distracts us from getting real wealth building work done.

What do I do?

Setting Boundaries

I check my email first thing in the morning (y'all know I'm very good at not moderating blog comments 24-7), then at lunch break, and again after my chapter for the day is done. I don't stress about email while on vacation (though I sometimes check it as it is the easiest way to get a hold of me).

But, but, but, my boss/hubby/best friend/petsitter expects me to…

Setting Expectations

I don't answer the phone at home during the day. I've told everyone this. My excuse? I get too many telemarketing calls (true) but the interesting side effect is that I suddenly am in control of the phone. No one expects me to answer so if it rings, I can ignore it and continue writing.

I do the same thing with email. I say that I'll check email at so and so times. The hubby does this with his boss while on vacation. He sets up a checking in schedule.

Bosses understand. They ARE hiring you to get things accomplished. They simply would like to be in contact on a timely basis. It is up to the two of you together to define timely.

Remember that phones, PDA's, computers are tools. You are the master. They answer to YOU.